The Origin Story

The Arctic Ape
(Simia glacialus habitatus)

Discovered and rescued by an Inuit hunting party, the Arctic Ape was found in a small glacial cave just inside the Arctic Circle. The cave was discovered as a result of warming temperatures around the world. The scientific community, intrigued by the discovery of a new Great Ape species, conducted DNA analysis and found that he is related to mountain gorillas. He may also be related to Sasquatch and Yetis, based on descriptions given by eyewitnesses.

Extended hibernation seems to have caused traumatic amnesia and the Arctic Ape does not know how old he is; how or when he arrived in the Arctic Circle; or how long he was in hibernation.

Several artifacts, equipment, and supplies were found with the Arctic Ape. These items were collected and saved for when he found a permanent home. Not all of them will fit in his new house at once, so he exchanges items between storage and his research facility from time to time.

During considerable thawing and reconditioning, he developed an insatiable sweet tooth and desire to eat everything cold that he encountered.

He traveled the world, sampling all manner of frozen treats and drinks. This appetite led to research and study around the science of churning and freezing liquids and mixing in other substances to create yummy compounds. Through a series of experiments, he discovered that real milk, cream, soy, and yogurt form better tasting, nutritious desserts than re-hydrating powder-based mixes. He believes that infusing real fruit, chocolate, nuts, and grains make icy treats even more flavorful.

While doing all of this work, he found that there were way too many choices for him to decide which one was best and started looking for the perfect place to continue his experiments. Besides, hogging all this yumminess was not fair to the world.

The Arctic Ape reflected on his travels and searched for a vibrant, multi-cultural, friendly city with (of most importance) a warm year-round climate. He found the perfect location for his first one-ape dessert heaven, development center, and research laboratory in a “City of Lights” – Windcrest, Texas, a wonderful small city in the northeast corner of the San Antonio area.

The Arctic Ape is a master of frozen dessert technology, but he quickly admits that others have different ideas and can create things that enhance his creamy desserts. He provides his lab assistants with icy treats and goodies for underneath, on-top, and mixed inside, to form their vision of a perfect dessert. That’s our story!